When it rains .... it really starts to pour.
Right when you think you need a break from all of the craziness going on in your life, that's when things begin to crash down. Is this just coincidence? Or is God testing us to see how strong we really are?

I have absolutely no idea what the answer to that one is. But, I will tell you one thing -- if it's God testing us, then He must think that I'm Hulk Hogan. A girl can only take so much emotion! haha As it turns out, right after I received the upsetting/unsettling news that was talked about in my previous entry, I came down with this awful cold. And I'm talking, I can barely breathe, my throat feels like it's on fire, my head feels like it was filled with helium, my ears feel like I have the entire ocean in them, and my whole body just aches. Ok, ok.....so I'm complaining a little bit. Maybe even whining. Life could be worse....I know, I know. But, being away at school where I can't get that hug from Mom when I really need it, makes things a little bit harder. NOT to mention, my boyfriend and I (who've been dating for a year and a half) broke up completely unexpectedly during the halftime show of the Superbowl. All I have to say to that, is Thank Goodness the Steelers weren't the Patriots. That really would have made things out of control. (Yes, I'm a Steelers fan haha.) 

Now, normally I'm a pretty strong person, but this is just a lot to deal with. But, I will admit, I have no clue as to whether anyone reads these entries or not, but I do find them a little bit therapeutic. It's nice just to ramble and put everything out there. Just let the words flow and let the feelings out. So, thanks. Thanks for that little bit of sunshine. I'll definitely smile to that. :-)

Current Mood: calm
Current Music: Appreciating the silence. :-)

Throughout life you'll be tossed and turned. You'll be going in one direction and then be blown the other. Everything will seem perfect one day, and then the next day everything will be different. 

I took a long jog the other day. An hour and a half actually. It just felt so good to relax and forget about all of the craziness going on with school work, the end of senior year, and any type of silly drama. It felt amazing. The cold air chilling my face, the sun shining down on my head, and the slight breeze blowing past me. Everything seemed good. 

When I got home that afternoon, that's when I received the news. That's when I heard those 5 chilling words. Curiously calm but nervous, my mom's voice was heard on the other end of the phone line saying, "Your sister might have cancer." Nothing is certain, of course. Many tests need to be run. And, I'll be praying that it's nothing. But, it's a scare. And, even just hearing that it's a possibility is completely shocking me. I can't imagine how people react when they find out that they really do have cancer. 

Life's crazy sometimes like that. 

But, all we can do is live every day as it was meant to be lived. And love to our heart's extent. And smile and laugh and enjoy life. Life's a gift. It's fragile and short. It's scary and frustrating. It's happy and sad. But, it's life. And it'll throw us curve balls. But, depending on how we deal with those curve balls will determine the type of people that we will become and will either make us stronger or tear us down. 
I refuse to be torn down.

Current Mood: shocked
Current Music: Blue October